Renee Whaley, 66, blazed a trail for disabled students - St. Petersburg Times

While I owe a lot to many that helped me advocate for my son, this lady was the first person I spoke to that showed me that there was a road that must be traveled.

Renee Whaley, 66, blazed a trail for disabled students - St. Petersburg Times: "Renee Whaley, 66, blazed a trail for disabled students"


After the IEP meeting in Dec. of 1996 at Mann Middle School where I realized what a scum-bucket entity I was up against, I started desperately looking for resources to deal with the insanity. I reached out to my network. I was given the name of an attorney, which I found out later was the Whiteheads's attorney. I was given the phone number to the OCR in Atlanta. These gifts were anonymous from those who worked within the system and knew the truth.

My sister from Seattle sent me some books. One book was written by Barbara Bateman:Special Needs Education Advocacy Books (not sure is this is her first book). Another book was a legal reference to IDEA.

I realized that the school system played by a different set of rules, not honesty. It took me a few years to realize that being honest with laws was not a strong suit of the system.

I digress.

Somewhere in the first quadrant of 1997, I was honing my advocacy skills. One of the necessary requirements in parental advocacy is to know how to access your child's records. Needless to say, it is not as easy as it sounds. Those of you who follow the local blogs should understand how the paperwork game is a vicious animal and will bite you if don't handle carefully.

Closer to the point.

As a practice run in accessing my child's records, one day I went to my eldest son's high school at East Bay. I simply walked in and asked to see my son's cumulative file. Since he was in "gifted", (save that topic for another crock of simmered stew), I knew that he was supposed to have a written plan to address his status.

The first reaction was something to the effect of "Please wait while I get someone to help you." I waited. While I waited, my thoughts were remembering what I had read about how the system makes it difficult for parents. After about a 20 minute wait, I was finally met by the Guidance Counselor of my son.
She asked what I wanted and I said I just wanted to see his file. She asked what for, and I, with my recently found knowledge, politely said I just wanted to look at it to see what was in it. I knew that I didn't have to have a reason, but instead of giving the system something to label me like being an asshole, I played the game.

The Guidance Counselor and I went into a room with the file in her possession. We sat, and she asked me what specifically did I want to look at. I knowingly, with a bit of assertiveness in my voice, replied that I wanted to hold the file. She hesitated and then handed it to me. I opened it and saw that on the left side was my son's identifying records. On the right side, right on top, was a piece of paper that immediately got my attention. True to my new training, I didn't flinch, and continued through the file. When I had made it to the last page, the counselor asked me if there was anything else. I calmly replied, "yes, I would like a copy of that first page."

I thought I perceived an anxious look on her face. My thoughts were that since I seemed so calm and assured, she was not willing to challenge me. She left the room.

Minutes passed.

My mind was racing. Would they destroy that paper while I just sit here? Should I have insisted that I go with her to copy the paper? Now that I know that it is true that "they" have marked me, what else is there that I don't know. Suffice it to say that this was just one more moment that created the person that I am today.

After another 20 to 25 minute wait, the counselor returned with the Principal. The Principal politely asked me what it was that I wanted. Maybe I had forgotten. No, I made the same request for a copy of that page, which I identified as to content and author. The principal acknowledged that I may have a reason to be interested in that particular page, but that I should be reassured that her administration was looking out for the best interests of my son, and that is how I should perceive this situation.

I continued to be polite and agreeable, and again asked for a copy to be given to me.

She asked me what was I going to do with the copy.

I replied that it was part of my son's file, and I simply wanted a copy of it.

The Principal instructed the counselor to go make a copy. Again I wondered, will it be destoyed? Within a few minutes, the copy appeared. I thanked them, and left.

That same night, I went to a meeting at Chamberlain High School to attend a meeting the District was having where they were providing propaganda to parents about special ed laws. This was the third or fourth meeting that I had attended in this series, and they were prepared for me. They isolated me with a woman District personnel to keep me occupied so I wouldn't challenge what they were spewing.

That night, I had had enough, again.

The aforementioned paper was written by the guidance counselor to all of my eldest son's teachers. It effectively told the teachers that Mr. Hancock would be asking them questions about his son's Educational Plan (EP), and that they, the teachers, should be knowlegeable about the plan and not to give Mr. Hancock any false information.

Thank God, at least one parent wasn't going to be given false information.

The next day, again in search of help in how to deal with this insanity, I drove to St. Pete and met Ms. Whaley.

She knew the truth, as she had lived it for years. I was just beginning to see the truth, and she helped put a framework to the truth.

The article says that Ms. Whaley knocked down doors. I will attest that knocking down doors is nothing to the bulldozers that public school systems use.

Ms. Whaley frequently told the story of a school person who said that they could not name one redeeming quality about Renee's son. An all to common attitude of too many school employees that undoes all of the hard work of the professionals, and parents, who understand the challenge.

Too many people think that Renee and her ilk are overbearing. What too many people don't realize is that Renee, and her ilk, are fighting for their most prized children. And this fight is against power with ignorance.

I personally know all of the people mentioned in this article. If more people knew what all of the kids that are involved in this article have accomplished because their parents "knocked down doors", maybe there wouldn't be so many damned doors.